Weeknote 03/2025
“Living is nothing more or less than doing one thing instead of another.”
— José Ortega y Gasset
I have spent most of the last week concerned that I am going to die prematurely. This might sound hyperbolic, but I mean it: on Wednesday I went to see a GP who examined me and took my blood pressure (135/85, i.e. Stage 1 hypertension). I’ve been referred to the hospital for a heart trace, but my appointment isn’t for another month. I don’t feel right.
Last weekend I used the exercise bike in our (very cold) garage and my heart rate got up to 140bpm. That’s not particularly high, but when I got off I felt terrible. I continued to feel bad on Sunday, and then tried to go for a run on Monday. I got 2.5km into what I was planning to be 10km, but my heart rate unexpectedly went up to 183bpm when it should have been about 135bpm. I stopped and walked back home.
I think there’s three things in play here. First is the fact that the male members of my family have a history of heart fail, so there’s that. My dad’s always telling me to go and get checked out — and I have, not just this week, but last time something felt amiss. Second, I’m undeniably middle-aged now, so my body doesn’t particularly like being beasted; it doesn’t matter how much motivation you have if your body just isn’t having it. Third, I’m stressed because of the state of the world and due to not having enough work at the moment.
I’ve written a fair bit this week, although not all of it is published. On this blog I created a chronological timeline of the UK government’s Action Plan on AI, and composed a ramble-post using my e-ink tablet with a wireless keyboard. On the WAO blog, I published some key questions for 2025, and over at Thought Shrapnel I published:
- The feedback has to be orders of magnitude faster than the situation being controlled
- A certain brand of artistic criticism and commentary has become surprisingly rare
- One of the most disconnecting forces is our expectations of how others should be
- The time has come now for many, many people to forge post-capitalist lives, careers, professions, and futures
- A vector for deciding who is disposable
- The time to prepare is now
- At least until we’re dead, education’s purpose to help us survive and thrive, not just get a job
I’ve applied for some jobs. I’d much prefer to continue working through our co-op, but like a lot of organisations, we’re finding the current environment pretty tough. There’s some potential work on the cards, but if you’re reading this and are in control of a budget (or have influence) do get in touch. Feel free to share this page with your networks.
Today, we’re finally back to a bit of normality for a Team Belshaw weekend, with both my son and daughter having football matches this afternoon. I don’t think I’ll volunteer to run the line for either, but instead just enjoy watching. Sometimes I wonder what I’ll do with my weekends when they’ve both left home. Maybe I’ll become a football coach. Perhaps I’ll find something entirely different to do.
Next week is going to be a bit of a rollercoaster: we celebrate my son’s 18th birthday, but it’s also when Trump finally gets his grubby little hands back on the levers of power. For those who think that the latter isn’t going to be that bad, I think that a) you probably forgot how bad it was last time, and b) you possibly don’t realise how quickly really bad things can happen. Plus, this time he’s got the broligarchy on side.
Photo: Lacking an image for this weeknote, I literally just took my phone and took a photo of the painting above my head in the room we call the “spare lounge”. This particular painting is a special one for me: it’s by MJ Forster, a local artist, and I bought it with the first money I earned from consultancy in 2015.